Monday 29 February 2016

A Toast


There are only three things in the world that I hate, and one of them is goop (again).

Welcome back to goop-watch, where I share some of the wisdom found in this week's Gospel according to Gwyneth.
This enlightening article on giving speeches begins: "We’ve all been there: Cringing through an endless, or obnoxious, or embarrassing, or inappropriate, or just plain self-absorbed toast." Though I'm pretty sure it was meant to say "Oscar speech."

Then Nurse Jackie alumna Liz Flahive gives some advice on making a speech, though if it's anything like Nurse Jackie it'll amount to starting strongly and soon petering out.

The toast theme continues with a recipe for avocado toast. But not just any avocado toast. This avocado toast is "superpowered", so expect to see it in the next Iron Man film, sprinkled with Pepper Potts. Apparently, it will give you "great skin - inside & out." Whatever that means.

Join me next time on goop-watch for more crypto-fascist recipes. Until then, here's A Toast by Malcolm Middleton and David Shrigley, which really says it all.