Saturday, 6 July 2013

Travelling Without Moving II: The Heretic

There are only three things in the world that I hate, and one of them is when people insist on telling you all the details of their fucking boring holiday (again).

So, I just got back from the USA. Here are the edited highlights of the journal I kept. The word "highlights" here being used loosely, as in: "Here are some highlights from today's local elections."

Day 1
  • Flew to New York, managed to avoid being cavity searched in the airport. Result!
  • Watched The Look of Love on the plane, here's my review: Lots of naked people. 
  • Looking forward to meeting this Fiscal Cliff I keep hearing about. Apparently he never pays for a round.
  • Saw this stupid advert on the subway:

Day 2
  • Watched the Yankees play a game of rounders.
  • Went to 30 Rock!

Day 3
  • Enjoyed The Dark Knight boat trip, the Cloverfield subway tour and a go in the pram from Rosemary's Baby.
  • No sign of Louise Mensch.

Day 4
  • Went to the Natural History Museum where Alex discovered the world's funniest machine:

Day 5
  • Got the bus to Washington D.C.
  • Saw this great advert:

Day 6
  • No sign of President Romney.
  • Saw that white house from The West Wing, the building from Midtown Madness 3 and the bloke from Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter.

Day 7
  • Saw the PreCrime building from Minority Report! AKA the Ronald Reagan Building.
  • From Reagan to Regan - went to the stairs from The Exorcist! My pilgrimage is complete.

Day 8
  • Saw pandas at the zoo.
  • Attempted a 1000 piece Beatles jigsaw.

So that was my brief trip to America, based mainly on locations from films and TV shows. I'll leave you with an American sign, an American cat and Tubular Bells.

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